Breakup in the Time of Virtual Pag-ibig

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I’m not really sure if young Filipinos still know the song “Isang Linggong Pag-ibig” by Imelda Papin. But, it accurately describes the kind of whirlwind romance not meant to last.

These days, though, love has moved to cyberspace and Virtual Pag-ibig is everywhere: lovers who have to deal with LDR (Long Distance Relationship) because one of them needs to work abroad; those who fall meet their beloved through online dating sites; maybe that hopeless romantic waiting to captivate a boyfriend (or girlfriend) from a rich country to spice their love life and save them from poverty; or just the usual boy or girl who connects with their loved one online.

It doesn’t just happen during Valentine’s Day, but here are ways that people break up relationships online.

Seenzoned aka Disappearing Act.

Sobrang sweet niya nung una–may reply agad ang mga text mo, may mga pinapadala pang heartwarming quotes. At ipinangako na rin ang mga bituin at pati ang buwan. Kinantahan ka pa ng Harana ng Parokya ni Edgar. But the past few days, or weeks, though, ayaw man lang magparamdam sa iyo. And when you checked his Facebook account, may picture naman ng pagkain niya sa isang fastfood.

But when you send a message, ang tanging nakikita mo ay ang blue check mark. Alam mong nakita at nabasa niya ang message mo. But… NO. REPLY. Seenzoned na nga yan!

Changing Relationship Status on Facebook.

For some couples, a relationship status on Facebook isn’t really a big deal. But in our Super-Connected world, ito na ang major-major na paraan para i-announce sa mundo na KAYO NA! Depende rin sa couples yan, pero minsan source din ng away ang hindi pagpapalit ng “In a Relationship with…” kapag naging kayo na.

Pero if ang BF or GF mo ay biglang nagpalit ng Relationship Status mula sa “In a Relationship” to “Single”, i-check mo na ang phone mo at baka may text na rin siya. Maybe something like: “It’s not you, it’s me.” o di kaya ay “Kung tayo talaga, magiging tayo pa rin in the end.” or some other lame excuse of a breakup.

Breaking up through a Facebook or a Text Message.

Siguro, ito na ang isa sa mga valid reklamo ng mga magulang at mga lolo at lola natin–na dahil virtual na ang pag-ibig, virtual na rin ang proseso ng breaking up. Sabagay, may mga nag-meet naman online na talagang na-fall in love sa isa’t isa. Pero you need to be careful in entering and nurturing a purely virtual relationship.

Malay mo ba kung picture niya talaga yun? O di kaya, baka scammer yan, or member ng isang sindikato.

Don’t believe me? Here’s one episode of one of my favorite podcasts Reply All:

It’s about scammers calling a woman in the US and building a relationship with them with the intention of getting money.

Anyways, I digress. Pero kung may karelasyon ka at kelangan na talaga ninyong mag-break (pero bago mo gawin yan, I suggest, mag-isip isip ka muna nang malalim at wag magpadalos-dalos), please lang, your partner deserves a face-to-face breakup conversation at hindi yung Facebook or Text message lang.

Ingat sa Public Breakup.

If you decide to breakup, please don’t do it in a very public place: like a fully-packed airplane or train, wag din sa rollercoaster. Ang problema kasi, kung may drama moments at may mga nakapaligid sa inyo na may camera at Internet access sa smartphone, baka makita mo na lang ang video or picture ninyo online.


Gaya na lang ng isang mag-jowa na nag-away or nag-breakup sa loob ng airplane: Siempre, may nag-Live Tweet sa drama moments nila.

Ito pa, huwag makipag-breakup habang nasa rollercoaster at huwag magpa-video dahil baka i-upload ito.

At kung kayo naman ang may camera at maging saksi sa ganitong klase ng breakup, just respect their privacy kahit na hindi kayo agree sa ginagawa nila in public.

Bottomline: Respect

If you enter into any relationship, you should respect each other. Be honest with each other–even if it means that the relationship has come to an end. Maraming reasons yan and gaya ng isang relationship status sa Facebook: It’s Complicated! Either way, just remember to respect your partner and he or she deserves a face-to-face conversation in the case of a breakup.

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Get A Life Online


For Social Media tips and tricks, check out my book “Get a Life… Online: Tips & Tricks para sa Hardcore na Netizen.

Available for only PhP 75 in all major bookstores nationwide. Also available on Ebook sellers: Buqo, Flipreads, & Google Play.

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